Article of the Day

In the first of what I hope is a long series of articles comparing dog breeds to actors in British period pieces, I bring you this amazingness...


I couldn't agree more about Bates...

But Matthew?!?  Who are we kidding, everyone knows that Matthew is a yellow lab...

Source.

The Lizzie McGuire Diet

Today is the first day of the rest of my life.

Today, I'm giving up pop.  Or soda, depending on your regional loyalties.  Well wishes are appreciated, but jokes about my Diet Coke addiction are appreciated even more.

Some of you are probably asking yourselves why you should care I've chosen to take this drastic step.  To answer that question, I'll cite one of my first pop-related revelations.  It was a Hilary Duff interview, which aired in 2005 on that beacon of hard-hitting television journalism, The View.

Fast forward to about 5:00...



WHAT?!  What do you mean diet soda makes you heavier??  It has no sugar and zero calories -- how is that even possible??

I immediately discredited her -- mostly because, up until this point, her most notable role was as tweenager Lizzie McGuire in the Disney Channel sitcom, masterfully titled "Lizzie McGuire."  Besides that one episode where Lizzie goes on a camping trip with her biology class, how much could she possibly know about science?

Yet, I couldn't get this out of my mind.  Even today, 7 years later, this interview still haunts me.  So, I've decided to test this hypothesis for myself.  I'm giving up pop.  I'm letting Lizzie McGuire take the wheel.

Incidentally, if this doesn't work out, I'm writing a strongly worded letter to the Disney Channel.

Ice Moms

Happy Friday!  With the weekend right around the corner, it's fun to think about all the exciting plans ahead.

As for me, I'll be spending the majority of my weekend thinking about the recent announcement of a new "Dance Moms" spinoff, "Ice Moms."  Somewhere out there, someone at the Lifetime Network corporate office loves me and wants me to be happy.

photo courtesy of the same site because, well, I'm lazy

How to Get a Husband

I had a real breakthrough last night.  While watching the critically-acclaimed television documentary "The Bachelor" for the first time, I had an "Aha!" moment.  Specifically, this program has developed some real 'best practices' for the art, nay science, of getting a husband, which I fully intend to use in my own life...

How to Get a Husband

Step 1: Threaten Violence Against Other Ladies

Step 2: Use a Fictitious Job Title

Step 3: Wear Some Sort of Low-Cut Onesie

Step 4: Employ the Liberal Use of F-Bombs













Step 5: Drink Heavily (but Remember to Eat Nothing)

Step 6: Cry in an Interview Room

Step 7: Cry in a Luggage Room

Step 8:  Pass Out












*all photos courtesy of www.abc.com