Deal of the Day

Things I'm not using a 'Living Social' deal for:

1. Corrective Eye Surgery

Deal of the Day

Look, all I'm saying is that, if there's truly a "man who gave birth to you," he probably deserves something more extravagant than a Groupon deal...

Summer Reading List

Computer-generated 'personal recommendations' might be my most favorite thing.  Like when Netflix uses my recent searches to suggest other movies I might like?  Or that time my DVR ghost-recorded a movie based on my assumed interests?

It was, therefore, with great excitement that I recently received an email from Amazon with the subject line, "Top Summer Reading Picks for Carrie."

And, I'll admit, I was right there with them all the way through "Psychological Thrillers."  But then we got to "Grilling," and things seemed to go off the rails...

My main conclusion is: evidently, I will never, ever be able to remove myself from the list of individuals who bought the entire Twilight series on the internet.

And Then This Happened.

One of my favorite parts about birthday season is the vast array of 'birthday deals' that usually come through my inbox.  This year, however, it seemed like the deals were pretty few and far between.  In fact, I was starting to think that I wouldn't receive any special birthday deals at all!

And then this happened.

Happy Birthday to Me!

Happy Hour Conference Call

Yesterday, we discovered the greatest/worst idea ever.  Below is an excerpt from the actual email chain where this amazing/terrible concept was born. I think this might be a real slippery slope...

me:  we need to decide where we're going for happy hour tonight.
C:     is everyone free at 12:00 to discuss over the phone?
A:     I guess so?
C:     OK, great, here's the information:  Call-in number: 1-800-776-         Participant Code: 88     
me:   so, we're having a happy hour conference call?
C:     yes - I can't type that fast, and it's too hard to accurately reflect my emotions over email.


Recap:
this happened.

Celebrity Face Twins

Happy Saturday!  I hope everyone has a safe and fun holiday weekend.

As for me, I'll be taking some time off from blogging this weekend, while I sit in my apartment and quietly cry over this...

...the results of my "Who's Your Celebrity Face Twin?" survey.

Want to be saddened for yourself?  Try it here.  I dare you.

Breaking News

Today was a monumental day.

Today, reality looked me square in the face, and then punched.

Today, Facebook alerted me that my blog is considered spam.

I guess we all saw this coming.

Stop. Stop it Right Now.

Every time I'm up, Fandango brings me right back down...

Yes, yes I know I went to see Twilight: Breaking Dawn on a Friday night -- the day it came out.  Yes, I realize the majority of the audience was comprised of squealing tween-agers.  And yes, I remember how the sheer and utter anticipation of seeing Edward and Bella's unrequited love story played out, awkwardly, on screen was the highlight of my entire month.  But please, for the love of all that is good, stop sending me reminders of that via email.

An Open Letter to My Credit Card Statement

Dear Branch Bank & Trust,

Mistakes were made, I’ll admit that.  But regret is a two-way street, and you shouldn’t have given me an increased credit limit if you didn’t want me to spend it, in its entirety, at Bed Bath & Beyond.

Look, I realize that fiscal responsibility is a crucial component of financial independence, but did you realize that Soda Stream was named the 2011 Product of the Year by “PB&J Mom”?  And, in the long run, it is much more cost-effective for me to make my own carbonated water and mix it with $10-per-bottle syrups that taste just as good as any generic soda on the market.  Can’t you at least try to understand that?

Credit is a funny thing.  At first, you promise to allow me the freedom to make my own purchasing decisions without question, but once I reach the dollar limit, you yank all of that away.  Now, I don’t pretend to be an expert in macroeconomics – I was an anthropology major in college.  However, I do understand basic mathematics, and I can tell you that buying something that was originally priced at $100, but is now marked down to $84, with a 20%-off-coupon, means that I’m saving almost $33 on an item that I will very probably use within the next calendar year.

In today’s era of tightening our belts and becoming more resource-savvy, I think it’s equally important to make sure that the items we purchase can withstand the test of time.  Which is why I chose that brand-name stand mixer instead of the cheaper, very-highly-reviewed alternative.  I know that the additional $300 cost might look ridiculous on paper, but that’s only because I haven’t had the chance to read the instruction manual, which is surprisingly detailed.

Nevertheless, thanks to your thoughtful emails, letters, and phone calls, I have developed a plan for getting my finances in order, which is as follows:

1. Call my parents and cry;

2. Stop having fun;

3. Pay the minimum required amount each month;

4. Cry when I realize that, by paying the minimum required amount each month, my minimum payment amount actually increases.

It is my firm belief that, by employing these four easy steps, I will be well on my way to a debt-free lifestyle within the next eight-to-nine years, assuming I make absolutely no purchases whatsoever in that same timeframe.

Thanks again for the phone calls!

Sincerely,

Carrie             (Account #42    )

Breaking News

This just in...

Christmas is cancelled.

And Then This Happened.

I was having a self-righteous day today.  You know, in a good way.

"Carrie," I said, "you aren't actually that lame, you just do a good job of down-playing your awesomeness!  Like, when you go home after work tonight, seriously consider going out for drinks, and then ultimately decide to stay in?  That's not lame, that's cool."

And Then This Happened.